Soul Craft: When We Outgrow a Friendship

Soul Craft: When We Outgrow a Friendship

I have had to make new friends over the years. It’s not easy when you go through a transformation.

Our values and beliefs change when we evolve, and old friendships usually don’t survive when they do. This is why some people never change: they fear losing their smoking buddies or their drinking buddies or the people that they bonded with through less than positive habits and thought modes. They would rather keep the relationship intact at the expense of personal growth.

But for some people, there comes a point where trying to fit in or maintain the friendship becomes too uncomfortable. It’s like wearing clothing that is too tight. You feel restricted, and it becomes hard to relax. You don’t feel good anymore and you feel self-conscious in those social circles.

That is when you know you have outgrown your old way of life and those relationships.


How to Let Go of a Friendship

If you want to grow spiritually, you need to move away from relationships that keep you stuck in negative patterns. You don’t have to make a big show of breaking things off: doing so will just make old friends feel judged.

The simplest path is to find others that are also interested in personal growth and start spending more time with them. And if you cannot find other people, look to books: there are spiritual warriors and ancient philosophers who have trod the same path. They can keep you company for awhile.

Perhaps you will inspire others to follow. Perhaps not.

You may feel lonely for a time.
You will grieve.
You may be tempted to go back to an old relationship only to remember why you left it in the first place.

Be brave.
Keep growing.
Keep living intentionally.

You will find your tribe.
And you will also find something even more beautiful: your soul.
It will feel like coming home.

Have a question for me? I’m only an email away.

Until next time,
Adele (aka Sophie Winters)

Author Adele Frizzell/Sophie Winters

Sophie Winters is the author of three books. Sophie’s real name is Adele Frizzell. She enjoys travel, hiking, and lifting heavy weights. She loves inspiring people to get more out of life.

Her first book, The Cha Cha Club Dating Man-ifesto is written for all the single ladies, while her second relationship advice book, It’s Not You, It’s Us: A Guide for Living Together Without Growing Apart is for couples who want more joy, intimacy, and respect in their relationship. Her third book, Forty Daze, is a is a humorous self-help book about mindfulness, habit creation, and self-improvement through 40-day challenges. Both a book and a movement, you can get involved by signing up at

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